Self-Esteem and The Game of Life

Originally posted on Facebook on 14th December 2020


Level One Players are stuck in self-improvement, trying to build their self-esteem.

If you are a Level One Player in The Game of Life, it’s very likely that life is about trying to build yourself up to the point that you feel good about yourself. You want to be able to say, (and feel), that you have good self-esteem.
You believe that if you don’t build yourself up, you will feel bad about yourself, and will go on having low self-esteem.
You may recognise that our society frowns upon those who build themselves up too high because that’s narcissistic. This is how Level One Players of the Game of Life keep themselves focused on balancing the fine line between low, high, and too much self-esteem.
In the Game of Life, Level 1 Players believe that they have to do something in order to deserve something else in return – such as high self-esteem.
They are caught in the trap of having to do “something” to try to control their behaviours, their appearance or to make themselves happier. They are all about “Do do do”. They also set goals and then set out to achieve them. Doesn’t that seem to be a lot of hard work just to feel good about yourself?
Level One Players of the Game of Life not only feel a need to do something to improve their self-esteem, but they also believe that life is all about winning. They need to be successful in their self-improvement endeavours. Without winning successes, they can never feel good about themselves. And, so, they often feel like a failure.
Level One Players get stuck in a trap of self-evaluation. They have high self-expectation and then they try to live up to those, (often far too high), high expectations. If they do manage to live up to their high ideals they allow themselves to feel good about themselves, if they don’t they will often judge themselves harshly.
To feel fulfilled in this Game of Life we need to accept and love ourselves unconditionally. What Level 1 Players do is called “conditional love”; they regard themselves positively or negatively according to their current state. If they feel they have had some success, they will view themselves favourably and will, therefore, have good self-esteem.
Unfortunately, the state of feeling good about oneself in this way cannot be maintained long-term. The trap consists of always having to DO something; keeping busy to achieve the next success in order to feel good. They live as though good self-esteem is something that has to be continually built, and is not something that’s possible to HAVE.
In the Game of Life, it feels better to raise yourself to a so-called “higher level”.
Level Two players know how to “balance” their feelings between low, high and too much self-esteem.
The underlying issue here is whether or not you feel “worthy” or “unworthy” – but, worthy of what?
Do you feel unworthy?
Do you have low self-esteem?


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